On December 19th, 2013, Grace Helbig, Hannah Hart, and Mamrie Hart (also known as the Holy Trinity on YouTube) kicked their northwest No Filter [comedy] Show tour off in Vancouver at 7 pm at the Rio Theatre. Being a big YouTube fan, especially a fan of these three women, I asked my sister to buy my ticket for me for Christmas, and we went. And I left disappointed.
Firstly, doors would open to VIP ticket holders at 6 (which included a poster and a t-shirt, I believe) and the non-VIP ticket holders would get to enter the theatre at 6:30; therefore, being a non-VIP, my sister and I waited in an already formed line at 5:30. We did get into the theatre on time, however the show did not start until 7:30, a full thirty minutes after the re-scheduled start time. I half-heartedly joked in that half hour about how they were all divas, although something could have gone wrong in that time and I didn't know about it.
The show went well. I laughed and screamed and clapped to my heart's content. When the show ended, I thought it might have been around 9:30, 10 at the latest. The second thing I was not happy about was that it was only 8:40. I thought that the show was going to be at least 1.5 hours, but I guess with any comedy show, there comes a point where enough is enough.
As expected with any YouTube gathering of any kind, there were fans who wanted to meet with the vlogging stars and many stood inside the theatre waiting for the Holy Trinity to appear once more, to say hi, get a hug, and take a quick picture. But, they didn't show.
Soon thereafter (maybe 5 to 10 minutes), security and management were inside the theatre, telling people it was time to exit the seating area. So we stayed in the foyer. Then, we were told that it was actually time to get out of the entire building, because they were closing up.
I just want to insert here that the only reason I wanted to see the three ladies is because I had letters (and bracelets inside the envelopes) for them, since November of 2012, since I bought tickets to see them at VidCon 2013 in Anaheim this past August. I expected to give the letters to them at VidCon, but didn't realize the sheer volume of people that would be at the convention. I hope there are other people that agree with me out there, but I wasn't willing to spend 2 hours in a line (at VidCon) to get 2 seconds with three people I liked to learn about via social media.
I asked the [possible] manager if he could give something to the women, but he flat-out said no. Many were standing outside the front of the theatre, including myself and my sister, waiting for Grace, Hannah, and Mamrie to come out. 50 fans dwindled down to 20 and then 15. When it came closer to our departure time, a girl and a couple of her friends were saying that Hannah Hart was at the back of the theatre, that they got pictures with her, and that if we ran, we'd be able to catch her. So we did.
Unfortunately, we missed her, and were met by security and the manager. He said that we needed to clear the area because residents around the theatre were complaining about the noise.
First of all, what noise? Because we, the people at the front of the theatre, were not shouting, yelling, cursing, clapping our hands, or stomping our feet. There may have been some LGs in the alleyway, screaming when they saw one third of the trinity, but it wasn't us. Second of all, if he just didn't want us there, he should've just told us. No need for bullshit like, "It's cold out, I know it's cold [rubs his own arms for effect], so you guys should leave." WTF, I am sorry. $25 for an hour of a show and you're trying to *convince* me that I need to leave?
And lastly, clearly he knows nothing about YouTube, or me for that matter, because I would not scream in someone's face for the first time because I love them, I would have left if he asked nicely, and internet people can be persistent.
I got upset and wanted to cry because I was so frustrated with everything, and we needed to leave. I didn't know where everyone else at the show was from, but my sister and I lived 2 hours away by transit, so we had to leave in order to catch the bus we needed to take to make our commute shorter.
I didn't even need a picture or even *meet* the ladies. As much as I want to give them a hug, I would love to just get these letters off my hands, they've been with me for too long. I would've given them to someone who would actually get them to the women, but no one was willing. The letters are extremely outdated now, and will be until I [maybe] get them to the Trinity, but at least they would have the bracelets. My sister and I didn't talk on our way home; I can't speak for my sister, but it was because I was not happy. I did tell her that I wanted to bury the letters so I would never have to see them again (and she added that I should burn them).
A lot of "what ifs" went through my sister's head too, and she shared them with me. For example, what if we considered going to the back alley? What if we asked security/management where the women were nicely? What if we had gone up to them while they were on stage to give them my letters?
All useless, but you wonder and question yourself all the same.
So I don't know why you wouldn't meet your fans in a smaller setting, Holy Trinity. I don't understand.
I'll get over it. Eventually. But for right now, I'm sulking and marinating in my self-pity.
Have you ever been let down by a "celebrity" because of the way they acted or the way they handled "fame"? Let me know in the comments below.
Thursday, 19 December 2013
Saturday, 30 November 2013
Reciprocated Appreciation
It was my birthday a few days ago, and I don't usually do anything for my birthday except for small get-togethers with various groups of friends/family: I went to see Catching Fire on opening day with my girlfriends from high school, had a family dinner and cake on the actual day, and had lunch with an elementary school friend. But I have a philosophy...You should get treated on your birthday, by your friends and family. It's only logical, because then they get to show you appreciation for your life. At least, that's what I think.
I also think that, if your friends are getting you gifts and you are having a dinner party or something of the sort, you should pay for dinner. (This comes from years of going to other friends' "parties" and paying for my dinner as well as their gifts. I realized that, when we were all younger, we paid for the food and the entertainment, and the presents that your friends brought would somewhat offset the price of the entire affair. As we got older, however, this changed: the individual has to pay for everything.)
The movie night was fantastic, my friends actually bought me gifts (which they didn't have to do, because I told them they didn't have to) and bought my dinner; I, therefore, didn't let my friends pay for the movie tickets, because I was showing them my appreciation for them. I find that's also fair.
My family is always good to me, and this year was no exception. Sushi for dinner, cream puffs and brownies for dessert, and presents (various items from the frozen yogourt chain, Menchie's, and a pair of [faux?] leather boots).
But then I went to lunch with my friend. And this is the part that irked me for a while yesterday (Friday): I had gone to her birthday earlier in September, and spent $100 dollars on dinner, gifts, and movies, but she didn't even offer to pay for my lunch, which only cost $15. I found this kind of ridiculous. Clearly, I value her more as a friend than she does me.
And this isn't the only time it's happened to me; this is only one of many occurrences.
Have you had any problems like this? Let me know.
I also think that, if your friends are getting you gifts and you are having a dinner party or something of the sort, you should pay for dinner. (This comes from years of going to other friends' "parties" and paying for my dinner as well as their gifts. I realized that, when we were all younger, we paid for the food and the entertainment, and the presents that your friends brought would somewhat offset the price of the entire affair. As we got older, however, this changed: the individual has to pay for everything.)
The movie night was fantastic, my friends actually bought me gifts (which they didn't have to do, because I told them they didn't have to) and bought my dinner; I, therefore, didn't let my friends pay for the movie tickets, because I was showing them my appreciation for them. I find that's also fair.
My family is always good to me, and this year was no exception. Sushi for dinner, cream puffs and brownies for dessert, and presents (various items from the frozen yogourt chain, Menchie's, and a pair of [faux?] leather boots).
But then I went to lunch with my friend. And this is the part that irked me for a while yesterday (Friday): I had gone to her birthday earlier in September, and spent $100 dollars on dinner, gifts, and movies, but she didn't even offer to pay for my lunch, which only cost $15. I found this kind of ridiculous. Clearly, I value her more as a friend than she does me.
And this isn't the only time it's happened to me; this is only one of many occurrences.
Have you had any problems like this? Let me know.
Thursday, 21 November 2013
Music
Hey all,
Sorry about not writing regularly. I'd blame school, but I was just lazy, I think. I also haven't been keeping up with stickers system I outlined in a previous post.
Anyway, as you can see by the title, I'll be talking about music. Well, my taste in music.
Just this afternoon, I downloaded a bunch of songs I had kept in a playlist on YouTube (as a reminder to download them). It's interesting how my music varies. I'd say that I mostly have pop, hip hop on my iTunes, but even that doesn't really encompass everything I listen to: I listen to a lot of YouTube covers, which I believe are 1000x better than the originals. It's crazy, but I think that these covers make up most of my songs in my iTunes library. Even just looking at what I downloaded today, it varies from covers as well as mainstream music. And I love my covers so much. Now that I think about it, I probably talked about this before. I mean, telling you guys all about my favourite Tubers; many of those Tubers are musicians, like Kurt Hugo Schneider and Kina Grannis, and they're amazing. I'd recommend checking them out when you have time.
So, my question to you guys is what do you like to listen to/what's your favourite music genre? Let me know in the comments below :)
Sorry about not writing regularly. I'd blame school, but I was just lazy, I think. I also haven't been keeping up with stickers system I outlined in a previous post.
Anyway, as you can see by the title, I'll be talking about music. Well, my taste in music.
Just this afternoon, I downloaded a bunch of songs I had kept in a playlist on YouTube (as a reminder to download them). It's interesting how my music varies. I'd say that I mostly have pop, hip hop on my iTunes, but even that doesn't really encompass everything I listen to: I listen to a lot of YouTube covers, which I believe are 1000x better than the originals. It's crazy, but I think that these covers make up most of my songs in my iTunes library. Even just looking at what I downloaded today, it varies from covers as well as mainstream music. And I love my covers so much. Now that I think about it, I probably talked about this before. I mean, telling you guys all about my favourite Tubers; many of those Tubers are musicians, like Kurt Hugo Schneider and Kina Grannis, and they're amazing. I'd recommend checking them out when you have time.
So, my question to you guys is what do you like to listen to/what's your favourite music genre? Let me know in the comments below :)
Saturday, 21 September 2013
I missed last week -_-
And I apologize. I can't even remember what I did on Saturday...Hm, nevermind. Maybe it was my dad's friend's barbeque: we came home in the wee hours of the morning and I was *very* tired.
Anyway, right now I'm focused on readings for school...As well as social media as procrastination ;) I really enjoy social media, if I haven't already mentioned this. I love getting reply tweets and YouTube reply comments and, recently, spring.me/paulajaey questions (although I haven't gotten any, so you're welcome to ask me a question there :D I've just been answering "Icebreakers").
The only thing I can really say, which I could've said at the beginning of September, was that the bus loop parking lot where I park my car is charging money now. $2 a day, which isn't bad, but it's $2 more than I was paying before :P
I hope all of your Septembers are going well, let me know what's new in the comments!
Anyway, right now I'm focused on readings for school...As well as social media as procrastination ;) I really enjoy social media, if I haven't already mentioned this. I love getting reply tweets and YouTube reply comments and, recently, spring.me/paulajaey questions (although I haven't gotten any, so you're welcome to ask me a question there :D I've just been answering "Icebreakers").
The only thing I can really say, which I could've said at the beginning of September, was that the bus loop parking lot where I park my car is charging money now. $2 a day, which isn't bad, but it's $2 more than I was paying before :P
I hope all of your Septembers are going well, let me know what's new in the comments!
Sunday, 8 September 2013
First Week of School!
So, this past week was the first week of school. And it went alright. The first week is always the best because nothing happens: we don't get homework, all we have to do is listen and maybe read a little of the textbook. It's fantastic. What I can tell you is that I have a lot of reading to do this semester, but I'm already ahead. I'm clearly winning this school thing right now. But let's wait and see what happens.
What have you guys been up to this past week? School? Work? How did it go?
What have you guys been up to this past week? School? Work? How did it go?
Tuesday, 20 August 2013
August 20, 2013
I got to hang out with a friend I hadn't seen in a while. We had dinner at Boston Pizza and saw a movie called 2 Guns. I liked the movie: a mindless action comedy starring Denzel Washington and Mark Wahlberg. I laughed a lot, so I guess I enjoyed myself quite a bit.
Anyway, while my friend and I were saying goodbye, there was this lull in the goodbyes, or an awkwardness, I suppose. We're not that close, we weren't ever close. She makes me smile and she has a lot of stories, which is fine with me because I like to listen to them: they're usually very entertaining. But other than that, we don't connect on a deeper level. She's not the person I'd confide in with my deeper secrets because she's not that kind of person, to me anyway.
Do you have a friend like this? And do you have someone you can talk to about anything?
Anyway, while my friend and I were saying goodbye, there was this lull in the goodbyes, or an awkwardness, I suppose. We're not that close, we weren't ever close. She makes me smile and she has a lot of stories, which is fine with me because I like to listen to them: they're usually very entertaining. But other than that, we don't connect on a deeper level. She's not the person I'd confide in with my deeper secrets because she's not that kind of person, to me anyway.
Do you have a friend like this? And do you have someone you can talk to about anything?
Tuesday, 13 August 2013
Hair
It's weird seeing myself with hair. At least, hair longer than my chin. I think having my hair short for a long period of time, bleaching and dying it, and then shaving my head last summer took a toll on how I see myself physically in the hair department. I tell people that I like my hair short more than long, but the benefits of having long hair (mostly in the styling area) is what draws me to growing it out. And then chopping it right off afterward.
My bangs are actually fairly long right now, so I'll be cutting them soon, probably straight bangs that eventually grow into side bangs.
So yeah, it's weird to me, having hair. It's everywhere.
I've also been experimenting with different partings. Like a deep left part, a deep right part, a part down the middle, zig-zag parts, no part. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. And guys who part their hair ;) Again, it's weird.
Let me know what your thoughts on the stuff that grows from our head are, I'd like to hear them.
My bangs are actually fairly long right now, so I'll be cutting them soon, probably straight bangs that eventually grow into side bangs.
So yeah, it's weird to me, having hair. It's everywhere.
I've also been experimenting with different partings. Like a deep left part, a deep right part, a part down the middle, zig-zag parts, no part. Ladies, you know what I'm talking about. And guys who part their hair ;) Again, it's weird.
Let me know what your thoughts on the stuff that grows from our head are, I'd like to hear them.
Thursday, 8 August 2013
I'm the Worst
And you all hate me. But that's ok. Because I'm sure only a few of you, if any, check to see if there's anything new ;)
Recently, I went to VidCon, and it was a blast. I met 20+ YouTubers ("famous" Tubers, some of which I'm subscribed to, others I am not, but that's ok, because I love them anyway) and met a few other cool people as well ^^
I did have a few problems with things, but that's because I'm an introverted person and big crowds tend to get to me after a while. Also, YouTuber meet-ups weren't what I was expecting, so I was a bit disappointed in that area.
The highlight of the weekend was meeting Lee Newton, from SourceFed. She's a sweetheart and a doll, and she made the time to talk to my sister and I for a few minutes. She even gave my sister a bracelet off of her wrist, and I screamed when she told me. (On the last day, I started to break down: tired from not sleeping much/well and being around too many people for long periods of time, so I went back to the hotel to rest for about 5 hours. I missed a couple things, but I don't regret it. I know what I can handle, and the last day of VidCon was something I couldn't.)
This weekend, I'll be visiting my friend on the Sunshine Coast of Vancouver, and I'm excited. I get to go away again for a bit, and hang out with an old friend.
What have you guys been up to recently? Let me know in the comments :D
Love.
Recently, I went to VidCon, and it was a blast. I met 20+ YouTubers ("famous" Tubers, some of which I'm subscribed to, others I am not, but that's ok, because I love them anyway) and met a few other cool people as well ^^
I did have a few problems with things, but that's because I'm an introverted person and big crowds tend to get to me after a while. Also, YouTuber meet-ups weren't what I was expecting, so I was a bit disappointed in that area.
The highlight of the weekend was meeting Lee Newton, from SourceFed. She's a sweetheart and a doll, and she made the time to talk to my sister and I for a few minutes. She even gave my sister a bracelet off of her wrist, and I screamed when she told me. (On the last day, I started to break down: tired from not sleeping much/well and being around too many people for long periods of time, so I went back to the hotel to rest for about 5 hours. I missed a couple things, but I don't regret it. I know what I can handle, and the last day of VidCon was something I couldn't.)
This weekend, I'll be visiting my friend on the Sunshine Coast of Vancouver, and I'm excited. I get to go away again for a bit, and hang out with an old friend.
What have you guys been up to recently? Let me know in the comments :D
Love.
Wednesday, 24 July 2013
The Heat
Is becoming unbearable. I mean, I'm just sitting here. In my room. Sweating. And it's very disgusting. Especially because today, I took a shower. So, I took a shower to get all the sweat off (from the heat and also from my workout), but now I have sweat on my body again.
I also want to mention here that I'm really sorry for not posting last week. I think it just slipped my mind/I was doing other, more unimportant things online because I was bored. Probably watching a movie actually. Plus, I wrote 2 blog posts that one week, so I deserved some kind of break ;P
Kidding, I love you, person reading this random and strange blog post from a person who is trying not very hard.
...And I'm pretty sure I wanted to mention something else, but I can't remember. Woo. My brain is amazing.
Ok, so that is it. Super short, again, but I posted!
Currently, I am in school, taking a French class. I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but I want to let you know that I'm still going strong. And it's going to be over next week!!! 5 weeks, intense, but not intense that the same time. The best kind of intense.
LOVE YOU ALL.
I also want to mention here that I'm really sorry for not posting last week. I think it just slipped my mind/I was doing other, more unimportant things online because I was bored. Probably watching a movie actually. Plus, I wrote 2 blog posts that one week, so I deserved some kind of break ;P
Kidding, I love you, person reading this random and strange blog post from a person who is trying not very hard.
...And I'm pretty sure I wanted to mention something else, but I can't remember. Woo. My brain is amazing.
Ok, so that is it. Super short, again, but I posted!
Currently, I am in school, taking a French class. I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but I want to let you know that I'm still going strong. And it's going to be over next week!!! 5 weeks, intense, but not intense that the same time. The best kind of intense.
LOVE YOU ALL.
Thursday, 11 July 2013
Nail Art
I don't know if you guys know this about me or not (I can't remember if I mentioned this in my 50 Facts post), but I really like to paint my nails. Not just one colour though: I love creating designs on my fingers. There's something about creating something on a little canvas that I really enjoy. I've started painting my sister's nails too, which is pretty cool because I get to practice, but also because she's stopped biting her nails, so her nails are growing! We've tried many different ways to get her to stop, and this seems to be helping, even though it hasn't in the past.
I usually get my inspiration from YouTubers, mostly cutepolish but also bubzbeauty. I'm also subscribed to tartofraises1, but her designs I find are a little more complicated, because they require detail paintbrushes and acrylic paint, even though she says they're easy to do. Practice makes perfect though. I just gotta find the courage to actually try one of her designs :P
One thing I'd really like to get done in my life is a manicure and pedicure. Even though I treat my nails well and the way I keep them is probably healthier than how they do it in a salon, I'd like to see what they do, just for the experience. There's this nail salon in Langley that I really want to try out, it's new, locally owned, and seems to have a really comfortable atmosphere. One day, I'll go. I hope.
I have some of my nails designs on my Twitter, @paulajaey, if you want to check them out. I haven't posted designs recently, but there are some there :)
Love.
I usually get my inspiration from YouTubers, mostly cutepolish but also bubzbeauty. I'm also subscribed to tartofraises1, but her designs I find are a little more complicated, because they require detail paintbrushes and acrylic paint, even though she says they're easy to do. Practice makes perfect though. I just gotta find the courage to actually try one of her designs :P
One thing I'd really like to get done in my life is a manicure and pedicure. Even though I treat my nails well and the way I keep them is probably healthier than how they do it in a salon, I'd like to see what they do, just for the experience. There's this nail salon in Langley that I really want to try out, it's new, locally owned, and seems to have a really comfortable atmosphere. One day, I'll go. I hope.
I have some of my nails designs on my Twitter, @paulajaey, if you want to check them out. I haven't posted designs recently, but there are some there :)
Love.
Tuesday, 2 July 2013
My Annoyance of a Mom
Do your parents annoy the hell out of you?
I really want you to think about it.
Like, really.
Really, really, really think about it.
Have you thought of something that they annoyed you with?
Are you sure?
Ok, now, with that in mind, I'd like to wager that my parents are 100x more annoying than yours.
Really.
It's funny, because whenever I start talking about my parents, it usually turns out negative. Like what they do, what they say, how they say it, and the list goes on. So far, I think I've only talked about my dad, because he scares the shit out of me, and I needed to vent.
Now, however, I'd like to talk about my mom.
Sure, she's my mom. Hell, she gave birth to me (technically, she endured an emergency cesarian section for me) and I should be grateful for that. Right? I might sound heartless, but I couldn't give a rat's ass if she did or not.
She's a liar, a hypocrite, a procrastinator, a perfectionist, a complainer, and extremely bipolar (although we haven't had a doctor tell us so. Yet). I know, some of these things that I mentioned cancel each other out, but no, she is all of these things.
For example, today, she started vacuuming the house. In the morning. When I got home in the late afternoon, the vacuum was right in front of my room. I also did my sister and I's bed sheets. In the evening, I got the laundry out of the dryer and went up to make our beds. I asked my mom if she was going to put away the vacuum. She replied that she didn't finish vacuuming the bedrooms. I got a little annoyed because I was making my bed: clean sheets and vacuuming do not mix, in my books. I thought she'd start up again as soon as I finished making the beds. But no. She did not. She vacuumed as I was putting the sheets on my bed.
Good Lord I wanted to yell at her so hard.
Oh, and that wasn't the last of it. She started vacuuming my room, only to stop a couple seconds later, to look through the drawers under my bed...WHAT THE HELL.
She then continued to ask me if I was still wearing certain clothing items and told me I needed to wash them. I should also mention that dirty, dusty ass vacuum head was on top of my clean, washed pyjamas. I got upset, and told her to take the vacuum head off while doing it myself. She started laughing and said that it wouldn't bother her if it was her things. I told her the clothes the vacuum head was on was not her clothes. Jesus.
When she finally finished with my room, she went on to my sister's. She then started to complain that we needed to empty our garbages out, because they were full. I replied that I was waiting for the end of the week, when the garbage would be taken out, because I had missed last week's pick up. She continued to say that the downstairs garbage was full and someone should have taken it out last week. I told her that her and my definition of full was different (but she didn't hear me say that, apparently).
And that's all. For today.
Let me know in the comments how your parents annoy you :)
Love.
I really want you to think about it.
Like, really.
Really, really, really think about it.
Have you thought of something that they annoyed you with?
Are you sure?
Ok, now, with that in mind, I'd like to wager that my parents are 100x more annoying than yours.
Really.
It's funny, because whenever I start talking about my parents, it usually turns out negative. Like what they do, what they say, how they say it, and the list goes on. So far, I think I've only talked about my dad, because he scares the shit out of me, and I needed to vent.
Now, however, I'd like to talk about my mom.
Sure, she's my mom. Hell, she gave birth to me (technically, she endured an emergency cesarian section for me) and I should be grateful for that. Right? I might sound heartless, but I couldn't give a rat's ass if she did or not.
She's a liar, a hypocrite, a procrastinator, a perfectionist, a complainer, and extremely bipolar (although we haven't had a doctor tell us so. Yet). I know, some of these things that I mentioned cancel each other out, but no, she is all of these things.
For example, today, she started vacuuming the house. In the morning. When I got home in the late afternoon, the vacuum was right in front of my room. I also did my sister and I's bed sheets. In the evening, I got the laundry out of the dryer and went up to make our beds. I asked my mom if she was going to put away the vacuum. She replied that she didn't finish vacuuming the bedrooms. I got a little annoyed because I was making my bed: clean sheets and vacuuming do not mix, in my books. I thought she'd start up again as soon as I finished making the beds. But no. She did not. She vacuumed as I was putting the sheets on my bed.
Good Lord I wanted to yell at her so hard.
Oh, and that wasn't the last of it. She started vacuuming my room, only to stop a couple seconds later, to look through the drawers under my bed...WHAT THE HELL.
She then continued to ask me if I was still wearing certain clothing items and told me I needed to wash them. I should also mention that dirty, dusty ass vacuum head was on top of my clean, washed pyjamas. I got upset, and told her to take the vacuum head off while doing it myself. She started laughing and said that it wouldn't bother her if it was her things. I told her the clothes the vacuum head was on was not her clothes. Jesus.
When she finally finished with my room, she went on to my sister's. She then started to complain that we needed to empty our garbages out, because they were full. I replied that I was waiting for the end of the week, when the garbage would be taken out, because I had missed last week's pick up. She continued to say that the downstairs garbage was full and someone should have taken it out last week. I told her that her and my definition of full was different (but she didn't hear me say that, apparently).
And that's all. For today.
Let me know in the comments how your parents annoy you :)
Love.
Laughing
Have you guys ever laughed at something really funny for one moment, and then laughed about it again < 30 minutes later? With the same people? In the same conversation? I have. On many different occasions.
I was just thinking about it when I was putting the sheets back on my bed: is that a sign of being socially awkward? Like, still being in the moment of the funny story and not wanting to move on, even though the people you are sitting with have moved on with a different conversation subject?
I tried reasoning that the reason I do that is because I like being happy. This may be hard to believe for those of you who have read all of my blog posts from the beginning, since I tend to bitch about a lot of things...Hah, the next post I'm going to write right after this one is no exception. (Yes, you guys are going to get two blog posts in one day! How lucky are you? I figured as soon as I get the thoughts in my head, I should type them out immediately. Or else I'll forget and my passion for the topic will have vanished.)
Sometimes I think that I am more socially awkward than other people. And then I meet those people who think they are even more socially awkward than myself. But really, I think I am. I tell people that I'm better at listening to people than speaking with people: maybe this is just something I say to cover up what I'm actually like.
I don't know, this is as far as my thought processes went. What do you guys think?
Love.
I was just thinking about it when I was putting the sheets back on my bed: is that a sign of being socially awkward? Like, still being in the moment of the funny story and not wanting to move on, even though the people you are sitting with have moved on with a different conversation subject?
I tried reasoning that the reason I do that is because I like being happy. This may be hard to believe for those of you who have read all of my blog posts from the beginning, since I tend to bitch about a lot of things...Hah, the next post I'm going to write right after this one is no exception. (Yes, you guys are going to get two blog posts in one day! How lucky are you? I figured as soon as I get the thoughts in my head, I should type them out immediately. Or else I'll forget and my passion for the topic will have vanished.)
Sometimes I think that I am more socially awkward than other people. And then I meet those people who think they are even more socially awkward than myself. But really, I think I am. I tell people that I'm better at listening to people than speaking with people: maybe this is just something I say to cover up what I'm actually like.
I don't know, this is as far as my thought processes went. What do you guys think?
Love.
Tuesday, 25 June 2013
Summer
I don't know about you guys, but where I am, summer isn't quite here.
The first day of summer was this past Friday...and today, the weather seemed extremely bipolar. When I woke up, it was cloudy. Later on in the day, it was grey and then it rained. The sun then broke out for a few moments before it was overpowered by clouds once again. Right now, it's cloudy, with patches of blue sky peeking out, and a little bit of a wind. Clearly, Mother Nature hasn't gotten the message.
I'd also like to mention that today was my first day of school, for the summer semester. I'm only taking one class, and it's in intercession, which means it's very fast paced: 2 weeks of regular semester crammed into one. Since it was the first day, the class wasn't too bad, pretty easy and the time seemed to fly by. Obviously, it's going to get more intense and I'm going to be pulling out my hair by mid July, believe me.
Or not. We'll see. I handle stress in a weird way, although I've been told it's not uncommon. When I get stressed out, I tend to not do anything about it. I just leave it where it is and don't come back to it the next day. This is not a good way to handle stress, but it's what I do, and it's working out pretty well for me. I'm doing ok in school, not A material but I get by with Bs or the close equivalent (C-s are close enough for me, truly. As long as I pass the class and it counts for credits, I'm happy).
But yeah, that's where I'm at right now. How are you guys doing?
Love.
The first day of summer was this past Friday...and today, the weather seemed extremely bipolar. When I woke up, it was cloudy. Later on in the day, it was grey and then it rained. The sun then broke out for a few moments before it was overpowered by clouds once again. Right now, it's cloudy, with patches of blue sky peeking out, and a little bit of a wind. Clearly, Mother Nature hasn't gotten the message.
I'd also like to mention that today was my first day of school, for the summer semester. I'm only taking one class, and it's in intercession, which means it's very fast paced: 2 weeks of regular semester crammed into one. Since it was the first day, the class wasn't too bad, pretty easy and the time seemed to fly by. Obviously, it's going to get more intense and I'm going to be pulling out my hair by mid July, believe me.
Or not. We'll see. I handle stress in a weird way, although I've been told it's not uncommon. When I get stressed out, I tend to not do anything about it. I just leave it where it is and don't come back to it the next day. This is not a good way to handle stress, but it's what I do, and it's working out pretty well for me. I'm doing ok in school, not A material but I get by with Bs or the close equivalent (C-s are close enough for me, truly. As long as I pass the class and it counts for credits, I'm happy).
But yeah, that's where I'm at right now. How are you guys doing?
Love.
Tuesday, 18 June 2013
Adventuring
Hey guys.
Sorry this post is a day late. I've had a crazy last few days, especially over the weekend.
What happened was that the long-time facilities manager at Hope Bay Bible Camp is going to be leaving soon, and this weekend was his going-away hang out. The plan for my sister and I was to arrive Friday afternoon and leave Saturday night. Early Saturday afternoon, my sister said to me that she would like to stay for the entire weekend, so leave Sunday night instead of Saturday. I called my mom to ask if this was ok, she said it was, and that was that. I just needed to figure out when the ferry left Sunday night and then I forgot about it. Then, Sunday morning, I woke up at 7, 2.5 hours earlier than I had to wake up, and realized that I needed to extend the parking time of my car since I drove it to the ferry terminal.
Other than that, my weekend was pretty good. Missed Father's Day with the father, but we had made a card before we left and then went out to dinner Monday night.
And yeah. Basically the only friend I keep regular contact with keeps asking me to hang out...but if I'm being honest, I would really like to stay at home for the next week or so, being lazy, like I usually am. I also need to catch up on sleep before school starts. Yes, I said school is starting. On the 25th. I'm so excited -_-
Anyway, that's all I gotta say. I hope you all are well. Let me know in the comments if anything crazy has been going on in your life!
Love.
Sorry this post is a day late. I've had a crazy last few days, especially over the weekend.
What happened was that the long-time facilities manager at Hope Bay Bible Camp is going to be leaving soon, and this weekend was his going-away hang out. The plan for my sister and I was to arrive Friday afternoon and leave Saturday night. Early Saturday afternoon, my sister said to me that she would like to stay for the entire weekend, so leave Sunday night instead of Saturday. I called my mom to ask if this was ok, she said it was, and that was that. I just needed to figure out when the ferry left Sunday night and then I forgot about it. Then, Sunday morning, I woke up at 7, 2.5 hours earlier than I had to wake up, and realized that I needed to extend the parking time of my car since I drove it to the ferry terminal.
Other than that, my weekend was pretty good. Missed Father's Day with the father, but we had made a card before we left and then went out to dinner Monday night.
And yeah. Basically the only friend I keep regular contact with keeps asking me to hang out...but if I'm being honest, I would really like to stay at home for the next week or so, being lazy, like I usually am. I also need to catch up on sleep before school starts. Yes, I said school is starting. On the 25th. I'm so excited -_-
Anyway, that's all I gotta say. I hope you all are well. Let me know in the comments if anything crazy has been going on in your life!
Love.
Monday, 10 June 2013
My Calendar
I'm not sure how you guys keep yourself organized, but recently, I've been putting stickers onto my calendar. (I don't remember if I've talked about this before, but you're going to have to suck it up if I have. Besides, I don't think there are many people that read this :P ) Each sticker is represented by something I need to do, or will do. For example, this month, Christmas stickers represent my exercising (I get to put a sticker into the day box if I have done 30+ minutes of working out), Disney stickers represent my need to exfoliate once a week, and so on. There are a lot of stickers on my calendar, and if I could post a picture I would, but for now, you're going to have to believe me. Last week is filled with stickers, and I'm thinking that this week will be the same.
Anyway, that's all I have for now. Sorry for not being as subject based as I thought I would be, but sometimes I don't feel like writing about serious things.
See you next week!
Love.
Anyway, that's all I have for now. Sorry for not being as subject based as I thought I would be, but sometimes I don't feel like writing about serious things.
See you next week!
Love.
Monday, 3 June 2013
Being Busy
So much for not doing anything this summer.
I've been quite busy this past week and a half or so. Lots of going places and spending money. Fun.
As much as I love doing things with my family, seeing and hanging out with my friend, I would honestly rather be working. A job. That pays me money. So I can do other things. Like travel.
I would love to elaborate on this more, except that it's kind of late, and I *almost* forgot I had to write a blog post today. (In June, it's gonna be Mondays!)
Let me know what your guys' summer plans are! I will probably tell you guys mine later on this month. Right now, I need to be sleeping!
Love.
I've been quite busy this past week and a half or so. Lots of going places and spending money. Fun.
As much as I love doing things with my family, seeing and hanging out with my friend, I would honestly rather be working. A job. That pays me money. So I can do other things. Like travel.
I would love to elaborate on this more, except that it's kind of late, and I *almost* forgot I had to write a blog post today. (In June, it's gonna be Mondays!)
Let me know what your guys' summer plans are! I will probably tell you guys mine later on this month. Right now, I need to be sleeping!
Love.
Thursday, 30 May 2013
Losing Weight
...is ridiculously difficult. I've been told it has to do with what you eat, but the problem is (as I have mentioned before) is that I love food. There's a good chance that I shouldn't eat what I eat, but I do, because it's delicious.
Then there's this thing where you can eliminate one thing from your diet, like sugar or carbs or just wheat or whatever you want, but that's hard for me too. How do you know there's no sugar in pasta? And I can't not eat carbs. It is necessary sometimes.
I have tried though. I went without sugar for...three days. Ok, not even, but I tried! Like only having one sugary thing a day, whether it be a piece of candy or a yogourt. Currently, I'm trying to just eat less of what I have been eating. Like instead of two servings, I'll just have one, or I'll just have a handful of chips instead of five. And I've been drinking water like crazy and eating fruits (bananas, apples, whatever we have in the house) instead of other types of not-so-good-for-you snacks.
I am also "working out," if you can call it that. I already told you guys about Cassey from Blogilates. So far, I've been doing a number of her workouts, but what I'm doing these days is her "Stretching for Flexibility" video and then this "Sexy Leg and Butt Workout" that bubzbeauty (a beauty guru I have also talked about) did in one of her vlogs. I'm also doing some lifting weights, but they're only three pounders, so it's not much.
I'm also going to let you know that I haven't been working out the Saturday-Tuesday of this past weekend. I was away from home, and having a routine while "vacationing" isn't really possible. Different environment, different foods, different schedule, etc. And I gained 3 pounds from that trip. But I am going to get back on track...even though I'm leaving again tomorrow. This is going to be a wonderful year for losing weight. I have a feeling that I won't be losing anything, but here's to hoping I will.
Love.
Then there's this thing where you can eliminate one thing from your diet, like sugar or carbs or just wheat or whatever you want, but that's hard for me too. How do you know there's no sugar in pasta? And I can't not eat carbs. It is necessary sometimes.
I have tried though. I went without sugar for...three days. Ok, not even, but I tried! Like only having one sugary thing a day, whether it be a piece of candy or a yogourt. Currently, I'm trying to just eat less of what I have been eating. Like instead of two servings, I'll just have one, or I'll just have a handful of chips instead of five. And I've been drinking water like crazy and eating fruits (bananas, apples, whatever we have in the house) instead of other types of not-so-good-for-you snacks.
I am also "working out," if you can call it that. I already told you guys about Cassey from Blogilates. So far, I've been doing a number of her workouts, but what I'm doing these days is her "Stretching for Flexibility" video and then this "Sexy Leg and Butt Workout" that bubzbeauty (a beauty guru I have also talked about) did in one of her vlogs. I'm also doing some lifting weights, but they're only three pounders, so it's not much.
I'm also going to let you know that I haven't been working out the Saturday-Tuesday of this past weekend. I was away from home, and having a routine while "vacationing" isn't really possible. Different environment, different foods, different schedule, etc. And I gained 3 pounds from that trip. But I am going to get back on track...even though I'm leaving again tomorrow. This is going to be a wonderful year for losing weight. I have a feeling that I won't be losing anything, but here's to hoping I will.
Love.
Thursday, 23 May 2013
ASMR
I've actually been listening to and watching ASMR videos on YouTube for a while now, to get to sleep. It's interesting but also sad how dependent I've become towards these videos and these ASMRtists, like I can't fall asleep without listening to one through my phone.
Ok, some background, for those of you who don't know what ASMR is:
ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response...I literally Googled that because I didn't know what it stood for. And I didn't read anything else on it, all I know is that it makes me feel nice and relaxed before I completely shut down to rest.
There's one aspect of it, which I'm not sure how it fits into all of this, but how I know it works for me: I get "tingles" at the back of my head, and it feels soooo good. I didn't understand what these ASMRtists were talking about in their videos, but once I started watching them, I got hooked.
One of the questions that many of these YouTubers ask is when was the first time you experienced tingles. It took me a while to figure it out, because my memories blur a little. I've definitely had tingles all of my life, but the one moment where it stands out the most is when I was in grade 5. I needed help with either science or math homework, so one of my friends at the time helped me out. All of a sudden, I had this weird sensation going on in my head, somewhere at the back of my brain. It felt really nice, and I wanted it to continue, but it didn't. I don't know how long it lasted for, but I think it was quite a while.
Anyway, some of my favourite ASMRtists are GentleWhispering, TheWaterWhispers, and UnicornWhispers. All three of them are really great in their own ways, and I'm currently obsessed with their videos, slowly going through their combined 300 videos or so. Check them out if you're having trouble relaxing and/or going to sleep.
Love.
Ok, some background, for those of you who don't know what ASMR is:
ASMR stands for Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response...I literally Googled that because I didn't know what it stood for. And I didn't read anything else on it, all I know is that it makes me feel nice and relaxed before I completely shut down to rest.
There's one aspect of it, which I'm not sure how it fits into all of this, but how I know it works for me: I get "tingles" at the back of my head, and it feels soooo good. I didn't understand what these ASMRtists were talking about in their videos, but once I started watching them, I got hooked.
One of the questions that many of these YouTubers ask is when was the first time you experienced tingles. It took me a while to figure it out, because my memories blur a little. I've definitely had tingles all of my life, but the one moment where it stands out the most is when I was in grade 5. I needed help with either science or math homework, so one of my friends at the time helped me out. All of a sudden, I had this weird sensation going on in my head, somewhere at the back of my brain. It felt really nice, and I wanted it to continue, but it didn't. I don't know how long it lasted for, but I think it was quite a while.
Anyway, some of my favourite ASMRtists are GentleWhispering, TheWaterWhispers, and UnicornWhispers. All three of them are really great in their own ways, and I'm currently obsessed with their videos, slowly going through their combined 300 videos or so. Check them out if you're having trouble relaxing and/or going to sleep.
Love.
Thursday, 16 May 2013
Make-up
I'm 20 years old, if you haven't guessed already. (Some of my blog posts may have hinted to this fact, since I have told you guys what year of university I'm in...)
And I don't wear make-up on a regular basis.
Ever since I was a little girl, I told myself, and the people around me, I would never wear make-up.
So far, I have kept to this statement, except on special occasions like my high school graduation. On rare occasions, I put on a lip gloss, but I usually have my trusty Burt's Bees lip balm around and that's what I put on my lips. (I'm really into natural things, ingredients I can read and understand.)
But now I'm thinking, knowing how to put make-up on myself, and on other people, would be a good skill to learn and to have.
Obviously I wouldn't wear the whole sha-bang every single day, since when I do put make-up on, taking it off is the worst part. (The last time I put eyeliner on, it took about 6 Q-tips, both sides, and one round cotton disc to take it all off, because I was paranoid the liner was hiding in my lashes and it would be there forever. I also refuse to put on mascara because that shit would take even more time to remove; my lashes are naturally long, if I do say so myself.)
When I would need to put on make-up though, for nice events and certain occasions, I would know like to know how to put the stuff in a nice way, instead of guessing and half-assing it.
I look at the beauty gurus' tutorials and videos (bubzbeauty on YouTube! She's the only one I'm subscribed to however: she's very down to earth, silly, cute; she's not afraid to make a fool out of herself and I admire her for that) and how they put make-up on. They do it effortlessly, but I know that they practiced and experimented a lot with different products, and that's why they're so good. I don't want to practice though. I'm not down with putting something on and taking it off right after, especially if it takes more than 5 seconds to remove.
...So basically I'm just being lazy and pessimistic. What's new? :)
I hope you guys didn't mind the round-aboutedness of this post. Haha, my brain, it's lovely.
Love.
And I don't wear make-up on a regular basis.
Ever since I was a little girl, I told myself, and the people around me, I would never wear make-up.
So far, I have kept to this statement, except on special occasions like my high school graduation. On rare occasions, I put on a lip gloss, but I usually have my trusty Burt's Bees lip balm around and that's what I put on my lips. (I'm really into natural things, ingredients I can read and understand.)
But now I'm thinking, knowing how to put make-up on myself, and on other people, would be a good skill to learn and to have.
Obviously I wouldn't wear the whole sha-bang every single day, since when I do put make-up on, taking it off is the worst part. (The last time I put eyeliner on, it took about 6 Q-tips, both sides, and one round cotton disc to take it all off, because I was paranoid the liner was hiding in my lashes and it would be there forever. I also refuse to put on mascara because that shit would take even more time to remove; my lashes are naturally long, if I do say so myself.)
When I would need to put on make-up though, for nice events and certain occasions, I would know like to know how to put the stuff in a nice way, instead of guessing and half-assing it.
I look at the beauty gurus' tutorials and videos (bubzbeauty on YouTube! She's the only one I'm subscribed to however: she's very down to earth, silly, cute; she's not afraid to make a fool out of herself and I admire her for that) and how they put make-up on. They do it effortlessly, but I know that they practiced and experimented a lot with different products, and that's why they're so good. I don't want to practice though. I'm not down with putting something on and taking it off right after, especially if it takes more than 5 seconds to remove.
...So basically I'm just being lazy and pessimistic. What's new? :)
I hope you guys didn't mind the round-aboutedness of this post. Haha, my brain, it's lovely.
Love.
Sunday, 12 May 2013
To John Green
One day, I might actually email this to my favourite author and YouTuber, but for now, it'll be memorialized on my blog.
Dear John Green,
I just finished reading your latest novel, The Fault in Our Stars, after a year and a half wait since its publication. Let me tell you why, as well as telling you a little bit about myself, and telling you about my thoughts about your novel and asking my questions.
Right out of high school, I went to university. My mom was very adamant to my sister and myself to finish at least one year of post-secondary because she was scared that we would never go back to school otherwise. (It was basically a waste of time on her part however, because my sister is now currently out of school.) In my first year, I went to Trinity Western University, in British Columbia. It's the only Christian university in BC, I believe, and I felt that having a foundation of Christian teaching, as well as smaller class sizes with a better teacher-to-student ratio and a 30 minute transit commute, would be good for me and a good ease into post-secondary.
After my first year, I was somewhat dissatisfied with Trinity: ridiculous tuition costs, the community wasn't very supportive, and I had difficulties making friends on a continuous basis, even though I was keeping my average from high school unlike many of my high school friends. So, I decided to transfer to another school, Simon Fraser University, with monstrous class sizes, barely any professor attention, and a 2 hour transit commute from my home. But I paid less for transportation and tuition, and I got to meet up with old high school friends from my hometown.
Now, I don't know if you had this happen to you, but as my university semesters went on, my motivation to read fiction diminished considerably. In high school, I would devour 10+ novels every week; I told my sister that our librarian probably got sick of seeing us at the check out counter since we were there almost every day after school. The librarian in question also memorized our student numbers, because we were there so often. Which was nice, because then we wouldn't have to stand there and spout of numbers at a semi-slow pace so she could type them out. Anyway, back to my lessened love of literature: because of my numerous university textbooks, reading for leisure didn't appeal to me, and I would end up sitting down in front of my computer for hours on end, mostly on YouTube, including watching your and Hank's videos on your multiple channels. (I really enjoy Mental Floss, by the way. Rapid fire facts have become a pleasure of mine these days. Nerdfighteria is getting to me, in a good way.)
I managed to squeeze some fiction into my life during those semesters though, I have no idea how. Must've been a break in my consciousness.
Ok, so, your novel.
I want to be bold and say that it wasn't your best, but I horrifically biased: An Abundance of Katherines is my favourite, even after Papertowns and TFiOs. (My friend put it best when she said she and I seem to love mediocrity.) I will confirm this statement thought, after I compose this email since I will be re-reading it.
Ok, Hazel Grace and company: I got angry in the middle of it. Not frustrated about cancer or the characters' thoughts surrounding the cancer; I thought the thoughts were profound and got me thinking, which was nice. Instead, I got angry at the characters.
I tend to do this a lot, with many authors and novels. I find that there are parts where someone would speak, and I would throw a punch in their face because of how I was feeling; I would *need* to react for the character, and sometimes I would, by venting this emotion through words to my sister (since we read many of the books one after the other).
Like with Peter Van Houten. Oh, I'm getting mad right now as I think about him. When I was first introduced to him, I didn't want to read what he had to say; I wanted to skip through his part and continue on with the story. (And I kind of did. I do this thing where I skim through paragraphs to get to the next part, taking in a few words, and getting the gist. One day, I might get over my anger and read the novel again.) I got annoyed. Who was this guy to treat someone with cancer, someone who had an illness like his daughter, and be a total, excuse my language, egotistical ass, complete jerkface, interrupting-every-sentence douche, car-entering idiot, etc? THEN AGAIN, why didn't Hazel or Augustus start talking back to him in Holland? AND THEN, he has the audacity to show up to Augustus' funeral. I was mentally congratulating Hazel when she basically told Van Houten to get the eff out of the car and him looking sad, because he deserved it. Obviously I felt a little twinge of possible understanding when he confirmed he had a daughter with leukaemia like Anna in An Imperial Affliction. Still, doesn't seem like he picked up a pen after the encounter. I can't even BEGIN to comprehend why Lidewij stayed for as long as she did.
Sorry, I may have rambled somewhere in the middle. It was too much for my brain.
Speaking of the assistant, I wanted to know more about her. Maybe you did write about her in the first manuscript, but how did she come in contact with Van Houten? How did she become his assistant? Did she keep in contact with Hazel after her last email?
But I loved Hazel's parents. Her mom was concerned, a little over-bearing but did so out of love, and funny and silly and a little bit sarcastic. Her dad was emotional but kind, and seemed to say the right things at the right time. (I especially liked his comment about the universe wanting to be noticed.) They were nothing like my parentals, which was wonderful and a breath of fresh air; I wish I had parents like that.
Isaac and Gus' banter was amazing too.
A lot of my friends, and my sister, said I would cry, because they did. And since I tend to be an emotional wreck when it comes to things, I thought I would be a puddle at the end. But I didn't shed any tears. Like I said, frustration took the better part of my emotions during the read, but I also laughed a lot, which I didn't think I would be doing much of while consuming the book.
I felt the need to write this right after I finished the book. Now, I'm not sure if it's worth the read. But if you do read it, I hope it wasn't a waste of time. For now, it'll be saved on my blog. I don't know if I'll have the courage to actually send it to you. We'll see. Time will tell. Or it won't. Either way, I'll know I wrote down my thoughts about this book somewhere for the world to see.
Thank you for being awesome. I await your next novel, and my thoughts.
A loyal Nerdfighter,
PaulaJaey
Dear John Green,
I just finished reading your latest novel, The Fault in Our Stars, after a year and a half wait since its publication. Let me tell you why, as well as telling you a little bit about myself, and telling you about my thoughts about your novel and asking my questions.
Right out of high school, I went to university. My mom was very adamant to my sister and myself to finish at least one year of post-secondary because she was scared that we would never go back to school otherwise. (It was basically a waste of time on her part however, because my sister is now currently out of school.) In my first year, I went to Trinity Western University, in British Columbia. It's the only Christian university in BC, I believe, and I felt that having a foundation of Christian teaching, as well as smaller class sizes with a better teacher-to-student ratio and a 30 minute transit commute, would be good for me and a good ease into post-secondary.
After my first year, I was somewhat dissatisfied with Trinity: ridiculous tuition costs, the community wasn't very supportive, and I had difficulties making friends on a continuous basis, even though I was keeping my average from high school unlike many of my high school friends. So, I decided to transfer to another school, Simon Fraser University, with monstrous class sizes, barely any professor attention, and a 2 hour transit commute from my home. But I paid less for transportation and tuition, and I got to meet up with old high school friends from my hometown.
Now, I don't know if you had this happen to you, but as my university semesters went on, my motivation to read fiction diminished considerably. In high school, I would devour 10+ novels every week; I told my sister that our librarian probably got sick of seeing us at the check out counter since we were there almost every day after school. The librarian in question also memorized our student numbers, because we were there so often. Which was nice, because then we wouldn't have to stand there and spout of numbers at a semi-slow pace so she could type them out. Anyway, back to my lessened love of literature: because of my numerous university textbooks, reading for leisure didn't appeal to me, and I would end up sitting down in front of my computer for hours on end, mostly on YouTube, including watching your and Hank's videos on your multiple channels. (I really enjoy Mental Floss, by the way. Rapid fire facts have become a pleasure of mine these days. Nerdfighteria is getting to me, in a good way.)
I managed to squeeze some fiction into my life during those semesters though, I have no idea how. Must've been a break in my consciousness.
Ok, so, your novel.
I want to be bold and say that it wasn't your best, but I horrifically biased: An Abundance of Katherines is my favourite, even after Papertowns and TFiOs. (My friend put it best when she said she and I seem to love mediocrity.) I will confirm this statement thought, after I compose this email since I will be re-reading it.
Ok, Hazel Grace and company: I got angry in the middle of it. Not frustrated about cancer or the characters' thoughts surrounding the cancer; I thought the thoughts were profound and got me thinking, which was nice. Instead, I got angry at the characters.
I tend to do this a lot, with many authors and novels. I find that there are parts where someone would speak, and I would throw a punch in their face because of how I was feeling; I would *need* to react for the character, and sometimes I would, by venting this emotion through words to my sister (since we read many of the books one after the other).
Like with Peter Van Houten. Oh, I'm getting mad right now as I think about him. When I was first introduced to him, I didn't want to read what he had to say; I wanted to skip through his part and continue on with the story. (And I kind of did. I do this thing where I skim through paragraphs to get to the next part, taking in a few words, and getting the gist. One day, I might get over my anger and read the novel again.) I got annoyed. Who was this guy to treat someone with cancer, someone who had an illness like his daughter, and be a total, excuse my language, egotistical ass, complete jerkface, interrupting-every-sentence douche, car-entering idiot, etc? THEN AGAIN, why didn't Hazel or Augustus start talking back to him in Holland? AND THEN, he has the audacity to show up to Augustus' funeral. I was mentally congratulating Hazel when she basically told Van Houten to get the eff out of the car and him looking sad, because he deserved it. Obviously I felt a little twinge of possible understanding when he confirmed he had a daughter with leukaemia like Anna in An Imperial Affliction. Still, doesn't seem like he picked up a pen after the encounter. I can't even BEGIN to comprehend why Lidewij stayed for as long as she did.
Sorry, I may have rambled somewhere in the middle. It was too much for my brain.
Speaking of the assistant, I wanted to know more about her. Maybe you did write about her in the first manuscript, but how did she come in contact with Van Houten? How did she become his assistant? Did she keep in contact with Hazel after her last email?
But I loved Hazel's parents. Her mom was concerned, a little over-bearing but did so out of love, and funny and silly and a little bit sarcastic. Her dad was emotional but kind, and seemed to say the right things at the right time. (I especially liked his comment about the universe wanting to be noticed.) They were nothing like my parentals, which was wonderful and a breath of fresh air; I wish I had parents like that.
Isaac and Gus' banter was amazing too.
A lot of my friends, and my sister, said I would cry, because they did. And since I tend to be an emotional wreck when it comes to things, I thought I would be a puddle at the end. But I didn't shed any tears. Like I said, frustration took the better part of my emotions during the read, but I also laughed a lot, which I didn't think I would be doing much of while consuming the book.
I felt the need to write this right after I finished the book. Now, I'm not sure if it's worth the read. But if you do read it, I hope it wasn't a waste of time. For now, it'll be saved on my blog. I don't know if I'll have the courage to actually send it to you. We'll see. Time will tell. Or it won't. Either way, I'll know I wrote down my thoughts about this book somewhere for the world to see.
Thank you for being awesome. I await your next novel, and my thoughts.
A loyal Nerdfighter,
PaulaJaey
Thursday, 9 May 2013
My Theory
I realized, a few minutes ago, that I don't have a family.
I wrote a post a while back, talking about my dad and his anger issues. Since that time, each member of my immediate family has gone into solitude, including myself. And I think it has been a long time coming.
I remember being happy. I remember when we didn't argue as much as we do now, or when we didn't have long and uncomfortable silences around the dinner table. I liked those times. But those times were also filled with ignorance. My parents shut my sister and I out of what was going on between the two of them, mostly financially, but I'm sure there were some physical, spiritual, and emotional stuff too. We were also younger, and we didn't know any better. Now that my sister and I are older, our dad tells us what's going on now, but Mom tries to keep us in the dark, occasionally yelling at us to go find a job and help out on the money side, revealing her fears of the future.
Merriam-Webster Online defines family many different ways: (1) a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head, (2) a group of persons of common ancestry, (3) a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation, and so on.
Personally, I don't think these definitions give the concept of family justice. A family should love, respect, have faith in, and enjoy each other. And right now, my family is not doing that.
I have other families too: my school(s) family, my camp family, and a little bit of a church family, but I'm sorry to say that these families are temporary. I don't live with any of these families 24/7/365. And if I did, it wouldn't be the same, because each member of each family has different values, ethics, morals, views, etc. so arguments could flare up just as easily. There's also an element of trust. I have dark corners buried within me, some I may not even remember today, and sharing this darkness isn't easily up for grabs. Even if someone earns it and I spill my guts, there's the slight chance that this person will judge me very harshly because of these secrets.
I know there are some of you out there who would say that you won't judge me, but who are you kidding? Everyone judges everyone. We can't stop. I know I can't. I think thoughts about someone, and the right after that, I think that that was wrong and I shouldn't have done that. But those thoughts would continue to nag me, those judgements about someone I didn't have the right to judge.
None of this might be making sense to you, whoever is reading this. But I just needed to write something about it.
I'm sad that my family is falling apart, and I don't know what to do about it. There's a good chance that I won't be able to do anything about it, because of the stubbornness of each person in my immediate family: my dad won't go to counseling; my mom seems to be bipolar; and my sister isn't going to help around the house on her own accord. We act like it's all good on the outside, but we're being hollowed out on the inside.
I wrote a post a while back, talking about my dad and his anger issues. Since that time, each member of my immediate family has gone into solitude, including myself. And I think it has been a long time coming.
I remember being happy. I remember when we didn't argue as much as we do now, or when we didn't have long and uncomfortable silences around the dinner table. I liked those times. But those times were also filled with ignorance. My parents shut my sister and I out of what was going on between the two of them, mostly financially, but I'm sure there were some physical, spiritual, and emotional stuff too. We were also younger, and we didn't know any better. Now that my sister and I are older, our dad tells us what's going on now, but Mom tries to keep us in the dark, occasionally yelling at us to go find a job and help out on the money side, revealing her fears of the future.
Merriam-Webster Online defines family many different ways: (1) a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head, (2) a group of persons of common ancestry, (3) a group of people united by certain convictions or a common affiliation, and so on.
Personally, I don't think these definitions give the concept of family justice. A family should love, respect, have faith in, and enjoy each other. And right now, my family is not doing that.
I have other families too: my school(s) family, my camp family, and a little bit of a church family, but I'm sorry to say that these families are temporary. I don't live with any of these families 24/7/365. And if I did, it wouldn't be the same, because each member of each family has different values, ethics, morals, views, etc. so arguments could flare up just as easily. There's also an element of trust. I have dark corners buried within me, some I may not even remember today, and sharing this darkness isn't easily up for grabs. Even if someone earns it and I spill my guts, there's the slight chance that this person will judge me very harshly because of these secrets.
I know there are some of you out there who would say that you won't judge me, but who are you kidding? Everyone judges everyone. We can't stop. I know I can't. I think thoughts about someone, and the right after that, I think that that was wrong and I shouldn't have done that. But those thoughts would continue to nag me, those judgements about someone I didn't have the right to judge.
None of this might be making sense to you, whoever is reading this. But I just needed to write something about it.
I'm sad that my family is falling apart, and I don't know what to do about it. There's a good chance that I won't be able to do anything about it, because of the stubbornness of each person in my immediate family: my dad won't go to counseling; my mom seems to be bipolar; and my sister isn't going to help around the house on her own accord. We act like it's all good on the outside, but we're being hollowed out on the inside.
Want-To-Dos
I realized that last week's post was similar to the one a few weeks back. I just went into more detail last week than the other post. Anyway.
I've been having trouble with something, and a lot of my friends have been going through this too: I'm procrastinating to do the things that I want to do. Sounds weird and horrible, but it's the truth. Here's an example. I want to read John Green's The Fault In Our Stars, and have been wanting to read it for a long time. I've read the first couple chapters (in 3 days, I might add ashamedly), but I haven no strong desire to pick it up! And this is my problem.
I used to be a really big bookworm. Like, I'd read 10+ books in a week before university. I would tell my sister that I think our high school librarian is getting sick of seeing our faces every day after school because of the amount of books we checked out.
But now, I'm a university student, and we read a poo-ton of textbooks in a year...and this has lessened my motivation to read fiction. It's really sad.
Maybe once I'm out of university, I'll want to read again, but I won't know until it actually happens.
Have any of you had this problem? What about any other issues you've been having recently? You don't have to spill your guts out to me, but if you want, I'm a good listener. Let me know in the comments below :)
Love.
I've been having trouble with something, and a lot of my friends have been going through this too: I'm procrastinating to do the things that I want to do. Sounds weird and horrible, but it's the truth. Here's an example. I want to read John Green's The Fault In Our Stars, and have been wanting to read it for a long time. I've read the first couple chapters (in 3 days, I might add ashamedly), but I haven no strong desire to pick it up! And this is my problem.
I used to be a really big bookworm. Like, I'd read 10+ books in a week before university. I would tell my sister that I think our high school librarian is getting sick of seeing our faces every day after school because of the amount of books we checked out.
But now, I'm a university student, and we read a poo-ton of textbooks in a year...and this has lessened my motivation to read fiction. It's really sad.
Maybe once I'm out of university, I'll want to read again, but I won't know until it actually happens.
Have any of you had this problem? What about any other issues you've been having recently? You don't have to spill your guts out to me, but if you want, I'm a good listener. Let me know in the comments below :)
Love.
Thursday, 2 May 2013
I'm the Worst/Change
I didn't publish a post last week -_-
No matter, I'm sure you forgive me...Maybe?
But here's the promised post-that-actually-has-a-topic post:
Last semester, I went to a spoken word competition that my friend, Savannah-Rain, was featuring in. But before I went to the venue, I spent some time in my childhood, at the library I went to with my mom and my sister almost every day of my young life. I sat down on a bench outside, eating my lunch, looking at my surroundings. I was thinking how a lot of it changed: everything looked old and stained with little bits of moss, nothing "sparkled" like it did when I was little. It was still a beautiful, sunny day though, so I enjoyed it. There were babies around the grass as well, chasing each other, walking, running, falling. I wondered if they would remember this place as magical like I did. After I finished my lunch, I went into the library to get some homework done. A few things changed inside too, like the entrance, the kids' section, and the hallway to the bathrooms. I also wanted to get online with my laptop, but I couldn't remember what the username/password system worked, so I couldn't get connected to the internet. Anyway, when I left the library, I realized that memories are just that, memories. Even if I remembered something a certain way, there would be no guarantee that that place or thing would be the same. I got a little nostalgic for that concept, how I wish nothing ever changed and things would stay the same as they were in my head. That's not how life works though. Things constantly change, whether we like it or not. We just have to learn to adapt. And slowly, but surely, we'll learn to accept what we thought we couldn't.
Love.
No matter, I'm sure you forgive me...Maybe?
But here's the promised post-that-actually-has-a-topic post:
Last semester, I went to a spoken word competition that my friend, Savannah-Rain, was featuring in. But before I went to the venue, I spent some time in my childhood, at the library I went to with my mom and my sister almost every day of my young life. I sat down on a bench outside, eating my lunch, looking at my surroundings. I was thinking how a lot of it changed: everything looked old and stained with little bits of moss, nothing "sparkled" like it did when I was little. It was still a beautiful, sunny day though, so I enjoyed it. There were babies around the grass as well, chasing each other, walking, running, falling. I wondered if they would remember this place as magical like I did. After I finished my lunch, I went into the library to get some homework done. A few things changed inside too, like the entrance, the kids' section, and the hallway to the bathrooms. I also wanted to get online with my laptop, but I couldn't remember what the username/password system worked, so I couldn't get connected to the internet. Anyway, when I left the library, I realized that memories are just that, memories. Even if I remembered something a certain way, there would be no guarantee that that place or thing would be the same. I got a little nostalgic for that concept, how I wish nothing ever changed and things would stay the same as they were in my head. That's not how life works though. Things constantly change, whether we like it or not. We just have to learn to adapt. And slowly, but surely, we'll learn to accept what we thought we couldn't.
Love.
Wednesday, 17 April 2013
FREEDOM
I had my English final from 7:00 to 9:30 this evening, I got home around 10:40, and I have 30 minutes to spare before I get this post published on time! Woo!
Not much to say, except that I finished school for the semester. Now, I just want to relax and go to sleep. Sorry for the disappointing post. Again. But, like I said in my last post, next week will start the more interesting topic'd posts! I hope you're excited.
I have a few more dreams that I will post on my dream blog in the near future, so stay tuned for that!
Love.
Not much to say, except that I finished school for the semester. Now, I just want to relax and go to sleep. Sorry for the disappointing post. Again. But, like I said in my last post, next week will start the more interesting topic'd posts! I hope you're excited.
I have a few more dreams that I will post on my dream blog in the near future, so stay tuned for that!
Love.
Wednesday, 10 April 2013
Finals
They're coming up for me, so this blog post is basically non-existent. I just wanted to let you guys know that I'll probably be back to more interesting topics in a couple weeks, the week after next week. But right now, I'll have my nose in the books...Or I'll try to.
Love.
PS. I am posting up on my dream blog more regularly though. At least, when I have the dreams. Check it out if you miss me ;)
Wednesday, 3 April 2013
Blogilates!
Hey guys, I forgot to make a post earlier, and now I don't have time to write a full post since I'm going to bed soon. I do want to say that I'm seriously wanting to lose weight this year, and I've been needing to find a way to be motivated to do so, since gyms scare me (crazy athletic/fit people walking around looking like they own the place, me being awkward and not as physically in shape) and I usually just sit around at home on my computer. Well, my sister showed me this vlogger, who does "pilates" workouts. Actually, I knew about her too, from Lindy aka bubzbeauty on YouTube: it's Cassey from blogilates on YouTube! She also has a blog, which is pretty cool. She gives health tips, food recipes, and different types of workouts. She has a workout calendar too, and I signed up for it, except that it's not working, which tells me that Cassey hasn't been on her blog in a while ;) Anyway, if you guys want to check it out, I highly recommend it. So far, I've been doing her warmup cardio video, and her Call Me Maybe Gangnam Style Squat Challenge video. They're super intense, but they're really good! I will definitely be checking out more of her stuff later on this week.
I hope all of you are doing well, check ya next week!
Love.
I hope all of you are doing well, check ya next week!
Love.
Thursday, 28 March 2013
Argh
I forgot to make a post on Monday...Honestly, I've been trying to think about what to write for my English papers due next week on Sunday and Wednesday, and I haven't started either of them. I mean, I've started outlines/notes for the things, but I don't have theses. Right now, I'm watching YouTube videos in the computer lab at school when I should've been at the gym and writing my papers. Then I have my last French class to go to, which I don't want to do, because it's dumb and I barely do anything. And I have to go. No choice. Wah.
Anywhos, Imma go. Because I have nothing to write about.
Love.
Anywhos, Imma go. Because I have nothing to write about.
Love.
Friday, 22 March 2013
Personal Moments
I made my weekly post, but I wanted to write some more. Something was bothering me a little too...
I don't know if this has happened to you or not (it probably has but I'm just saying since not a lot of people talk about it), but do certain things in nature happen to you, and it's beautiful, and you realize it must've been meant for you? They have to me. Like last semester, I was waiting for the bus, and across from the bus stop is a field. It was fairly early in the morning, around 7:30, and a little bit foggy. I was minding my own business, trying to look like I had something to do while I waited for the bus, when I looked at the field and saw a deer walk out from the side-trees. It was amazing; I looked around to see if there was anyone else walking around me or there were cars slowing down to look at the deer, but no one was. I looked back at the field, and that's when I saw another deer walk onto the field from the trees! It was magical. I really wanted to tell someone, but texting didn't give it justice and no one was around me. So that memory is all mine. Another example would be today. I was on the bus, going to school, when the driver slowed down all of a sudden. I looked out the other window and I saw a coyote leaping over the highway median to get to the other side. It was nice to see other cars slowing down for it to cross too. Then coming back from school, I saw a hawk or an eagle perched on one of the lamp posts. I seriously don't think people observe as well as I do, or else I would have heard someone say something!
I'd also like to say that nature and technology are intermingling here. In one of my English classes, we've been on the topic of nature, how it affects art and how we live. In these instances I've described from my own life, it's inevitable. We share this world with other creatures too, there aren't just humans on this planet. And even though we cover the grass and dirt with cement and tear down trees to make room for metal buildings, nature and animals still make an appearance in our daily lives. Maybe not as often as you'd think, but it does happen. And when it does happen, cherish the moment. Because they're beautiful beings, surviving through the weirdest conditions, not knowing whether or not their home and their children will be able to live through the next day. I become sad, thinking about the possibilities, but that's life I suppose.
Love.
I don't know if this has happened to you or not (it probably has but I'm just saying since not a lot of people talk about it), but do certain things in nature happen to you, and it's beautiful, and you realize it must've been meant for you? They have to me. Like last semester, I was waiting for the bus, and across from the bus stop is a field. It was fairly early in the morning, around 7:30, and a little bit foggy. I was minding my own business, trying to look like I had something to do while I waited for the bus, when I looked at the field and saw a deer walk out from the side-trees. It was amazing; I looked around to see if there was anyone else walking around me or there were cars slowing down to look at the deer, but no one was. I looked back at the field, and that's when I saw another deer walk onto the field from the trees! It was magical. I really wanted to tell someone, but texting didn't give it justice and no one was around me. So that memory is all mine. Another example would be today. I was on the bus, going to school, when the driver slowed down all of a sudden. I looked out the other window and I saw a coyote leaping over the highway median to get to the other side. It was nice to see other cars slowing down for it to cross too. Then coming back from school, I saw a hawk or an eagle perched on one of the lamp posts. I seriously don't think people observe as well as I do, or else I would have heard someone say something!
I'd also like to say that nature and technology are intermingling here. In one of my English classes, we've been on the topic of nature, how it affects art and how we live. In these instances I've described from my own life, it's inevitable. We share this world with other creatures too, there aren't just humans on this planet. And even though we cover the grass and dirt with cement and tear down trees to make room for metal buildings, nature and animals still make an appearance in our daily lives. Maybe not as often as you'd think, but it does happen. And when it does happen, cherish the moment. Because they're beautiful beings, surviving through the weirdest conditions, not knowing whether or not their home and their children will be able to live through the next day. I become sad, thinking about the possibilities, but that's life I suppose.
Love.
Monday, 18 March 2013
Nostalgia
I might make a few other posts like this, but I've been going through some nostalgic memories these past few weeks. For example, a couple weeks ago, I went to the library I used to go to as a kid with my mom and my sister, remembering all the fun times we had there. That's basically how I developed my love for reading, because my mom used to take my sister and I to the library every week during our elementary school years. And then yesterday, I rediscovered a TV show I used to watch on PBS on YouTube. It's called Cyberchase; I hope someone else out there knows it. I've been watching the episodes, and I've paused one right now so I could write this post. I had no idea there were so many seasons of it, there's eight!! I'm so excited to watch them all, because I know I haven't seen them all. But I will.
Post a comment letting me know some things you remember from your childhood that you've experience/you would like to experience again.
Love.
PS. For those of you who have been reading my dream blog, I have a few dreams noted down but I haven't had the chance to type them up yet. I will soon. Tomorrow or the next day. Thanks!
Post a comment letting me know some things you remember from your childhood that you've experience/you would like to experience again.
Love.
PS. For those of you who have been reading my dream blog, I have a few dreams noted down but I haven't had the chance to type them up yet. I will soon. Tomorrow or the next day. Thanks!
Monday, 11 March 2013
50 Facts About Me
I couldn't think of anything else to write...Yes, my creative juices are hardly flowing. Shocking. Anyway, hope you learn something ;)
- My favourite colour is purple.
- My favourite number is 27.
- I have a younger sister.
- My sister is my best friend.
- I have an 8 year old Silver Yorkshire Terrier named Tori.
- I like babying, bothering, and petting my dog.
- My favourite animal is a panda.
- My favourite fruit is mango, I really love mangoes.
- I love strawberry flavoured things; so strawberries would be my second favourite fruit.
- My favourite vegetable is broccoli.
- Pistachio gelato is amazing.
- Strawberry ice cream is my favourite kind of ice cream.
- I love to laugh, and I laugh easily.
- I am 100% Korean, to many of my acquaintances' surprise.
- I can't speak Korean, to many of my acquaintances' dismay.
- I'm 5'1".
- My current favourite song is Stars Falling Down Remix by Paul Dateh.
- I can speak French fluently.
- I took high school and first year university Spanish.
- My favourite season is autumn.
- I love to do art: doodle, sketch, paint.
- I like to sing.
- I can't sing when someone asks me to sing something on the spot.
- My favourite movie is Inception.
- I make "To Do" lists almost every day.
- I like to read.
- I haven't been able to read since I started university. (After reading textbooks, my motivation for reading fiction has dived.)
- I'm fairly insecure about my weight.
- I really like sweaters.
- I don't wear makeup on a regular basis.
- I don't know how to put on makeup.
- Even if I knew how to put on makeup, I wouldn't wear it on a regular basis.
- I've been in two car accidents since I've gotten my license...my "N" in BC.
- I love having short hair because it doesn't take much to maintain it.
- I love having long hair because I like doing different hair styles (ie. braids, French braids, ponytails, pigtails, etc).
- I had blonde streaks when I was younger.
- I was a platinum blonde.
- I was a redhead.
- I had purple streaks in my bangs.
- I shaved my head after dying it so much. It was cool. I'd do it again.
- I am obsessed with YouTube.
- My favourite YouTubers include vlogbrothers, communitychannel, dailygrace, TheFineBros, SourceFed, danisnotonfire, KurtHugoSchneider, WongFuProductions, RhettandLink, ThePianoGuys, and cutepolish...It's a long list because I have a lot of favourites. Like I said, obsessed.
- I also really like visiting Facebook multiple times every day.
- I enjoy playing WeTopia on Facebook; it's a good game. "Do good while you play"
- I really like Twitter too because I can stalk my favourite celebs...Wait, what? (Anna Kendrick's Twitter is hilarious btw. @AnnaKendrick47)
- If you want to give me a massage, I will not refuse.
- I love doing my nails. Go to my Twitter for some pics! @paulajaey :)
- If I keep nail polish on my nails for a long time/a continuous time, my nails hurt.
- Camp is a huge part of my life: I've been a camper and staff member since 2000. Yeah. Link to the camp is here: http://174.121.38.62/~hopebay/
- I really want to travel. Everywhere.
Well, I hope that was fun. I might do another one some other time...We'll see.
Love.
Monday, 4 March 2013
Nonsense
It's funny. Or not funny if you're an avid writer...Or it is funny if you are an avid writer who has a sense of humour. But anyway, this is what I wanted to say:
I tend to come up with good subject topics for a post during the week, to write on the day I'm supposed to write. Then I forget it, without writing the subject down somewhere. On those days, when I realize I didn't write anything about the post I thought about in my head and need to write about something, I kick myself in the head. Figuratively, since I'm not crazy flexible like that.
And today is one of those days. Go figure.
Also, I might have a number of blog post subjects already stored in the notes section of my phone, but I don't feel like writing about any of those subjects. Go figure again.
Sometimes this blog writing is difficult. Woot.
Love.
Thursday, 28 February 2013
A Lesson
So far, I think all of you have been given a pretty bad impression of my dad by me...I might have mentioned in that blog post that he is a good person, just that his temper can flare up, just like anyone else's.
And I was just thinking about this story on my way to school, and I thought I should share.
It was when I was really young, 7 years old or younger, and all of my family was in the car, our old Honda Civic, that we don't own anymore, on our way home. I don't remember how we started the conversation, or how it came about, but we were at a red light and Dad was facing my sister and I talking about trust...I had a hard time grasping the concept of trust; I can't remember what he or Mom was saying about it. At one point, I told Dad to go (because the light was green, when it wasn't). I was joking when I said it, but he started to take his foot off the brake pedal with him still facing us. When he turned his head forward, he realized that the light was still red, and put his foot back on the brake. He said that I should be careful, not to take advantage of people's trust. I asked him if he trusted me, and he said he did.
I will always remember this exchange. I learned one of the greatest life lessons from him, and I won't forget it.
Don't take your parents for granted. You might be older now, in your teens, twenties, etc, but listen to them. They've probably said this, other people have probably said this, but they've lived much longer than us, gone through a lot more experiences, and they're wiser than us. You'll always learn from them, even if you don't think you will.
Love.
And I was just thinking about this story on my way to school, and I thought I should share.
It was when I was really young, 7 years old or younger, and all of my family was in the car, our old Honda Civic, that we don't own anymore, on our way home. I don't remember how we started the conversation, or how it came about, but we were at a red light and Dad was facing my sister and I talking about trust...I had a hard time grasping the concept of trust; I can't remember what he or Mom was saying about it. At one point, I told Dad to go (because the light was green, when it wasn't). I was joking when I said it, but he started to take his foot off the brake pedal with him still facing us. When he turned his head forward, he realized that the light was still red, and put his foot back on the brake. He said that I should be careful, not to take advantage of people's trust. I asked him if he trusted me, and he said he did.
I will always remember this exchange. I learned one of the greatest life lessons from him, and I won't forget it.
Don't take your parents for granted. You might be older now, in your teens, twenties, etc, but listen to them. They've probably said this, other people have probably said this, but they've lived much longer than us, gone through a lot more experiences, and they're wiser than us. You'll always learn from them, even if you don't think you will.
Love.
Friday, 22 February 2013
Today/Double Standards
I feel better now, but today was a really stressful day. French project, sister miscommunication...and it ended in a lot of tears. That's usually what happens when I get into confrontations, haha.
I do have a blog post planned though, so I'm going to do that. Now.
In one of my English classes, we're learning about women in the 19th century. We've been talking about double standards a lot, mostly in the sexual sense. For example, married women who had affairs with another men had harsher consequences than married men who had affairs.
I was thinking a lot after we talked about double standards, how the same still kind of applies. I might have mentioned this before, but my dad constantly tells my sister and I that we should be cooking and cleaning and doing the housework whenever our mom isn't around. I understand that he works really hard (14+ hour days) to make the money around the house to pay for all the food and utilities and such, but we're in the 21st century...Women have come a long way in terms of equality and rights, and yet we're still expected to be the "homemakers".
So, I don't think these double standards have gone away. Yes, there has been improvement between the past and the present, but there are still certain mindsets to overcome.
I hope you guys enjoyed this, very, short blog post. Maybe it stirred up some questions and concerns you have about this topic as well.
Love.
I do have a blog post planned though, so I'm going to do that. Now.
In one of my English classes, we're learning about women in the 19th century. We've been talking about double standards a lot, mostly in the sexual sense. For example, married women who had affairs with another men had harsher consequences than married men who had affairs.
I was thinking a lot after we talked about double standards, how the same still kind of applies. I might have mentioned this before, but my dad constantly tells my sister and I that we should be cooking and cleaning and doing the housework whenever our mom isn't around. I understand that he works really hard (14+ hour days) to make the money around the house to pay for all the food and utilities and such, but we're in the 21st century...Women have come a long way in terms of equality and rights, and yet we're still expected to be the "homemakers".
So, I don't think these double standards have gone away. Yes, there has been improvement between the past and the present, but there are still certain mindsets to overcome.
I hope you guys enjoyed this, very, short blog post. Maybe it stirred up some questions and concerns you have about this topic as well.
Love.
Monday, 18 February 2013
New Blog!
Hey guys, I just wanted to let you know that I made a new blog: paulajaeydreams.blogspot.ca
I really like hearing about other people's dreams, but also telling my own...when I remember them the next day, that is. So I thought, since I already have a blog, and am trying to keep a consistent writing-ship, I should have a blog for my dreams too.
I've tried dream journals, writing them down in a notebook or typing them out on my phone, but that hasn't worked very well. This way, the dreams'll actually be around and I'll want to record them.
So, if you want to check it out great. If not, that's cool too.
Love.
I really like hearing about other people's dreams, but also telling my own...when I remember them the next day, that is. So I thought, since I already have a blog, and am trying to keep a consistent writing-ship, I should have a blog for my dreams too.
I've tried dream journals, writing them down in a notebook or typing them out on my phone, but that hasn't worked very well. This way, the dreams'll actually be around and I'll want to record them.
So, if you want to check it out great. If not, that's cool too.
Love.
Thursday, 14 February 2013
Deviation
So, I had a planned blog post for today, but that's changed.
Today marked a very significant event for John Green, Hank Green, and the Nerdfighting community, as well as for all of YouTube. (If you don't know what Nerdfighters are, then you need to go educate yourself. youtube.com/vlogbrothers should get you started...I'd recommend watching all of their videos, but you don't have to...I'm saying you should.) John Green, New York Times Bestselling author as well as one of my favourite authors, got to sit with the President of the United States Barack Obama on one of the Fireside Hangouts on Google+. The hangout is now posted on YouTube if you'd like to watch it.
I would also like to say that I have a Twitter (@paulajaey, if you'd like to follow), and was live tweeting the Fireside Hangout while I was watching it live. Anyway, near the end of the sit-down, John Green brought his wife, Sarah (also known as the Yeti to Nerdfighters, because she doesn't come on camera), into the frame and they asked the President to pick between two names for the baby they are expecting. Unfortunately, the President did not choose. HOWEVER, he told the unborn child to NOT FORGET TO BE AWESOME. This is significant, because DFTBA (standing for Don't Forget To Be Awesome) is the vlogbrothers and Nerdfighters' motto.
The scene to come was John and Sarah's disbelief, quick recollection and thanks...and Twitter blowing up. Hank Green (John Green's younger brother, environmentalist, blogger, creator of many YouTube related events and channels such as VidCon, The Lizzie Bennet Diaries, crashcourse and SciShow, and many other things) was also live tweeting the hangout, as is a momentous occasion for the Green family. In the moments to come after President Obama's recognition of the Nerdfighters' motto, many people were in shock and awe and tweeting about these emotions. I was also tweeting...and screen grabbing moments of the Fireside Hangout. After taking pictures, I tweeted these pictures...and received around 30 favourites and retweets within 30 minutes. One retweet was from a significant YouTuber, who goes by mickeleh, and I was thrilled. It was an unbelievable occurrence to happen to me, but I'm glad it did.
I just want to say thank you to the YouTube community, as well as the vlogbrothers and Nerdfighters around the world. All of you made my Valentine's Day, and I will cherish this day for the rest of my life.
And I hope all of you had a wonderful day.
Love.
Today marked a very significant event for John Green, Hank Green, and the Nerdfighting community, as well as for all of YouTube. (If you don't know what Nerdfighters are, then you need to go educate yourself. youtube.com/vlogbrothers should get you started...I'd recommend watching all of their videos, but you don't have to...I'm saying you should.) John Green, New York Times Bestselling author as well as one of my favourite authors, got to sit with the President of the United States Barack Obama on one of the Fireside Hangouts on Google+. The hangout is now posted on YouTube if you'd like to watch it.
I would also like to say that I have a Twitter (@paulajaey, if you'd like to follow), and was live tweeting the Fireside Hangout while I was watching it live. Anyway, near the end of the sit-down, John Green brought his wife, Sarah (also known as the Yeti to Nerdfighters, because she doesn't come on camera), into the frame and they asked the President to pick between two names for the baby they are expecting. Unfortunately, the President did not choose. HOWEVER, he told the unborn child to NOT FORGET TO BE AWESOME. This is significant, because DFTBA (standing for Don't Forget To Be Awesome) is the vlogbrothers and Nerdfighters' motto.
The scene to come was John and Sarah's disbelief, quick recollection and thanks...and Twitter blowing up. Hank Green (John Green's younger brother, environmentalist, blogger, creator of many YouTube related events and channels such as VidCon, The Lizzie Bennet Diaries, crashcourse and SciShow, and many other things) was also live tweeting the hangout, as is a momentous occasion for the Green family. In the moments to come after President Obama's recognition of the Nerdfighters' motto, many people were in shock and awe and tweeting about these emotions. I was also tweeting...and screen grabbing moments of the Fireside Hangout. After taking pictures, I tweeted these pictures...and received around 30 favourites and retweets within 30 minutes. One retweet was from a significant YouTuber, who goes by mickeleh, and I was thrilled. It was an unbelievable occurrence to happen to me, but I'm glad it did.
I just want to say thank you to the YouTube community, as well as the vlogbrothers and Nerdfighters around the world. All of you made my Valentine's Day, and I will cherish this day for the rest of my life.
And I hope all of you had a wonderful day.
Love.
Friday, 8 February 2013
I Already Failed
I stickered up my calendar. And I'm not speaking about this in figurative terms. It's for real.
Because I have so many stickers in my room (that I don't use and are just lying around collecting dust), I decided to put the sticky papered pictures onto my calendar, each kind of sticker representing something I need to do/remember. For example, Mickey Mouse stickers are for birthdays, weird looking smiley face stickers are for face exfoliation (once a week), and cute Asian bear stickers are for when I opened up a fresh pair of contacts...I'm telling you about this because I am also using a different kind of sticker for something special: sparkly animal stickers for a blog post (once a week, every Thursday).
As you can tell, I have already not done this, since today is Friday, but I'm trying people.
I couldn't think of an interesting blog topic...so this is what you get.
Love.
Because I have so many stickers in my room (that I don't use and are just lying around collecting dust), I decided to put the sticky papered pictures onto my calendar, each kind of sticker representing something I need to do/remember. For example, Mickey Mouse stickers are for birthdays, weird looking smiley face stickers are for face exfoliation (once a week), and cute Asian bear stickers are for when I opened up a fresh pair of contacts...I'm telling you about this because I am also using a different kind of sticker for something special: sparkly animal stickers for a blog post (once a week, every Thursday).
As you can tell, I have already not done this, since today is Friday, but I'm trying people.
I couldn't think of an interesting blog topic...so this is what you get.
Love.
Wednesday, 30 January 2013
Korea
I got into a conversation with a couple school people about travelling. Previously, we talked about Asian dramas and music and movies, because one of the girls was from Hong Kong, and the other was from Romania but loved everything Asian. One had lived in the Philippines and Hong Kong for many years, and she travelled to Japan and Korea. The Romanian girl asked me if I had been to Korea an hour or so before, and I told her no, because our family didn't really have a reason to go there. (Also because we didn't ever have the money to go.)
But when the girl said she had been to Korea before, the Romanian pointed and laughed at me, saying that the Korean girl hadn't gone to Korea before but the Hong Kongese girl had.
For some reason I felt very hurt by this.
One, I was born in Canada. I hadn't had the desire to go to Korea when I was younger, neither did the rest of my family, so we didn't go. We were also estranged from our extended family in Korea, so why would we go, just to be shunned away?
Two, how could this girl I just met today make fun of me in such a way as to say that I'm not Asian? That's what I felt was implied anyway...She's from Europe, and she has the audacity to make fun of someone who is native to Canada but has the ethnicity of an Oriental? What about herself? She's European, who loves KPop, and she hasn't been to Korea. WHAT??
Three, I want to go to Korea now. As long as I have the desire to do something that I didn't do in the past, or couldn't do, that's good enough, right?
Four. I started thinking about how humans can be very insensitive to people. How I lose faith in humanity just about every day because of some stupid things people do. That Romanian girl made me cringe, because there are probably a million other people in the world just like her.
And then I started thinking that I was probably like this, and maybe still am like this, insensitive to other people's needs. And how I need to change that.
I said at least one post every week, but school is an excuse I use every time, and it's the truth. It's 1 AM right now, and I still need to finish reading for my English class. Instead I'm here, writing a blog post. My brain is going to turn into mush soon...I need to finish reading.
Love.
But when the girl said she had been to Korea before, the Romanian pointed and laughed at me, saying that the Korean girl hadn't gone to Korea before but the Hong Kongese girl had.
For some reason I felt very hurt by this.
One, I was born in Canada. I hadn't had the desire to go to Korea when I was younger, neither did the rest of my family, so we didn't go. We were also estranged from our extended family in Korea, so why would we go, just to be shunned away?
Two, how could this girl I just met today make fun of me in such a way as to say that I'm not Asian? That's what I felt was implied anyway...She's from Europe, and she has the audacity to make fun of someone who is native to Canada but has the ethnicity of an Oriental? What about herself? She's European, who loves KPop, and she hasn't been to Korea. WHAT??
Three, I want to go to Korea now. As long as I have the desire to do something that I didn't do in the past, or couldn't do, that's good enough, right?
Four. I started thinking about how humans can be very insensitive to people. How I lose faith in humanity just about every day because of some stupid things people do. That Romanian girl made me cringe, because there are probably a million other people in the world just like her.
And then I started thinking that I was probably like this, and maybe still am like this, insensitive to other people's needs. And how I need to change that.
I said at least one post every week, but school is an excuse I use every time, and it's the truth. It's 1 AM right now, and I still need to finish reading for my English class. Instead I'm here, writing a blog post. My brain is going to turn into mush soon...I need to finish reading.
Love.
Thursday, 17 January 2013
School
So far, it's going well. I'm enjoying it, even though a couple days a week, I come home close to 8 PM.
I'm taking 2 English classes and 2 French classes, working on my double minor now since I finished all of my university requirements.
One of my classes is online, and it's a little weird, because we have group discussions...online. On a thread. There's also the fact that I have to submit all of the assignments on my own time, and make sure I get them done...I don't like being an adult D: (Hey, another blog topic idea, haha.)
I will say I'm a bit worried. I haven't written an English paper in a really long time...I hope it all comes back to me fast/the people that mark my work don't have high expectations. I also haven't spoken/wrote French in a year and a half, so I am very rusty. I keep stumbling in my French during class, and it's embarrassing.
That's basically it. I'm trying to keep afloat with all the reading and worksheets and essays and such. It's going to get difficult, but I hope to keep writing a post every week.
My sister is taking the semester off of school; she didn't particularly enjoy the fall, so she's "working"...which means hanging out around the house. Which is good for her, I think. She hasn't been sleeping well for the longest time, so she needs the rest. Mom doesn't agree.
Anyway, how are you guys doing?
Love.
I'm taking 2 English classes and 2 French classes, working on my double minor now since I finished all of my university requirements.
One of my classes is online, and it's a little weird, because we have group discussions...online. On a thread. There's also the fact that I have to submit all of the assignments on my own time, and make sure I get them done...I don't like being an adult D: (Hey, another blog topic idea, haha.)
I will say I'm a bit worried. I haven't written an English paper in a really long time...I hope it all comes back to me fast/the people that mark my work don't have high expectations. I also haven't spoken/wrote French in a year and a half, so I am very rusty. I keep stumbling in my French during class, and it's embarrassing.
That's basically it. I'm trying to keep afloat with all the reading and worksheets and essays and such. It's going to get difficult, but I hope to keep writing a post every week.
My sister is taking the semester off of school; she didn't particularly enjoy the fall, so she's "working"...which means hanging out around the house. Which is good for her, I think. She hasn't been sleeping well for the longest time, so she needs the rest. Mom doesn't agree.
Anyway, how are you guys doing?
Love.
Saturday, 12 January 2013
Evolutionism vs Creationism
Sorry if my last post dragged you all down. I just wanted to get what I was feeling out of my system, and this blog seems to do that for me, although I don't think I have many readers. That's ok. My semi-private journal, even though it's on the internet, which isn't private at all. And I seem to be the only one that knows about it, which might not be the case, but whatever. I don't know you who's reading it, and you're not showing yourself. So I suppose it'll stay that way.
Now, onto the real topic.
I meant to write this post before the beginning of the semester, but I didn't, so I'm doing it now. I wanted to tell you guys about my Earth Science class I took in the fall semester, my favourite class of my university career (side note, why do we call it a "career"? Does that make sense at all? I dunno, it doesn't to me), from my current school. I'd have to say that Math at the first university I went to was my favourite from there, because my teacher looked like Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory, but also because I made a lot of friends in the class and we had fun. (I've only been to two universities, so that should make things a little simpler.)
Anyway, as you might've noticed from my previous post(s), I am a Christian. I believe in having a good and strong relationship with God, and in turn, I believe in creationism. There are a lot of people that don't, and that's fine to not agree with my beliefs, but that's how the world goes round. Don't take offence to my opinions and beliefs; if you do, click away.
I think I'm one of the more reformed creationists though. Like, a lot of Christians think that it's just the seven days of creation, and that's it, there's nothing else to add on or take away from what it says in the first book of the Bible. I don't. I think that there are aspects of what science has discovered in the world, through the animals and the earth and so on, and aspects of creationism that go hand in hand. This is what I learned from my Earth Science class.
I also want to mention that I took an archaeology course in my second year at university, at the school I transferred to. This class made me not so on board with evolution, only because this class was all about human origins, and how we descended from monkeys; that was the premise, it seemed. The Earth Science class, however, made me see evolution from a different stand point, and it made more sense in my mind.
Here's what I think: I think that God created light and dark, and it was probably like that for millions of years. (I'd put in exact numbers and so on, except that it's already been a month since I last took the class; I forget easily, especially when it has to do with school.) Then the sun and planets were formed. Of course, science gets all science-y and says that gravity attracted particles from space, causing a compaction of all these particles which became a gas. And then the rest of the particles formed the planets in our solar system. Then this is when God became creative and started focusing on Earth and its inhabitants.
Now, I'm not going to go into the entirety of the creation story, since that would make this post even longer than it has already become. But I don't think that God took seven, what we consider now, days. To God, time doesn't matter...One day could be a thousand years, and a thousand years could be a day, and so on. He's our creator, and he can take all the time he wants. For this reason, Earth and the solar system is a lot older than Christians might come to believe. It's not just seven days. It's a lot of time. Billions and billions of years.
Love.
Now, onto the real topic.
I meant to write this post before the beginning of the semester, but I didn't, so I'm doing it now. I wanted to tell you guys about my Earth Science class I took in the fall semester, my favourite class of my university career (side note, why do we call it a "career"? Does that make sense at all? I dunno, it doesn't to me), from my current school. I'd have to say that Math at the first university I went to was my favourite from there, because my teacher looked like Sheldon Cooper from The Big Bang Theory, but also because I made a lot of friends in the class and we had fun. (I've only been to two universities, so that should make things a little simpler.)
Anyway, as you might've noticed from my previous post(s), I am a Christian. I believe in having a good and strong relationship with God, and in turn, I believe in creationism. There are a lot of people that don't, and that's fine to not agree with my beliefs, but that's how the world goes round. Don't take offence to my opinions and beliefs; if you do, click away.
I think I'm one of the more reformed creationists though. Like, a lot of Christians think that it's just the seven days of creation, and that's it, there's nothing else to add on or take away from what it says in the first book of the Bible. I don't. I think that there are aspects of what science has discovered in the world, through the animals and the earth and so on, and aspects of creationism that go hand in hand. This is what I learned from my Earth Science class.
I also want to mention that I took an archaeology course in my second year at university, at the school I transferred to. This class made me not so on board with evolution, only because this class was all about human origins, and how we descended from monkeys; that was the premise, it seemed. The Earth Science class, however, made me see evolution from a different stand point, and it made more sense in my mind.
Here's what I think: I think that God created light and dark, and it was probably like that for millions of years. (I'd put in exact numbers and so on, except that it's already been a month since I last took the class; I forget easily, especially when it has to do with school.) Then the sun and planets were formed. Of course, science gets all science-y and says that gravity attracted particles from space, causing a compaction of all these particles which became a gas. And then the rest of the particles formed the planets in our solar system. Then this is when God became creative and started focusing on Earth and its inhabitants.
Now, I'm not going to go into the entirety of the creation story, since that would make this post even longer than it has already become. But I don't think that God took seven, what we consider now, days. To God, time doesn't matter...One day could be a thousand years, and a thousand years could be a day, and so on. He's our creator, and he can take all the time he wants. For this reason, Earth and the solar system is a lot older than Christians might come to believe. It's not just seven days. It's a lot of time. Billions and billions of years.
Love.
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