Wow + Update

Reading that last post made me remember what was happening at the time...Weird.

Since then, I got a job at a grocery store, in their online orders department. The world is becoming very web based, and that department was a response to that. I'm sure you all know what it is: essentially a personal shopper, an employee from the store shops for you according to the list you created and submitted on the company's site. Then in a certain hour, you're supposed to come and pick up your groceries from the store. Easy as that. I worked for 8 months as a regular associate, and then I applied to become one of the department's lead supervisors (an assistant manager) which I somehow got. The pay was good, but it wasn't worth the head games and stress. Coupled with the heart break I ended up suffering from, the next 8 months were pretty bad. Everything culminated in me quitting, and I am currently jobless and aimlessly wandering the house aka sitting in one spot and on my laptop all day.

I am wasting time. No doubt about it. Last week I got the bright idea of getting into arts and crafts again, mainly painting, knotting friendship bracelets, and folding paper stars. I took myself out on a date this week: a movie and lunch. Eating by myself was awkward though, it didn't used to be but it was. Probably because I'm less confident about everything.

Say Yes To The Dress is one of my favourite shows, and whenever it's on TV, I tend to leave it on in the background. It made me think of one of my childhood friends, if you can call her that. We mainly only saw each other at church, but after a couple years, she stopped coming, I'm not sure why. Anyway, this friend created her own company for bridal wear. I guess since I last checked up on her social media, she has created...four other companies, all still mostly related to bridal.
I have this issue with jealously, I've known I've had it for a long time. Back when I checked up on her, many years ago, I was definitely jealous. It felt like she was living a life I desperately wanted but had no idea of achieving. Now however, I'm happy for her, like genuinely happy. Also proud for some reason, even though I don't know her as a person anymore. Maybe because she made a name for herself, doing what she loves, and she's my age. Goes to show how opposite we are on the spectrum of life. Neither is good or bad, although I do feel horrible about wasting my life. (Volunteering is something that was suggested for me to do. I have past experiences with that activity that make me steer away from it.)

I wanted to comment on the Ellen/President Bush thing that happened recently. Except that I have a lot of conflicting feelings about it so I think I'll just leave it where it is. There's enough back and forth online.

Hope you all are well. See you around.